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Written by: Stephanie Glennon
“Be the change you wish to see”. Everybody’s heard that expression, but hardly anybody actually examines what it means. Even then, the people who do examine what the expression means, nobody applies this methodology to their wardrobe.
Nobody but you, that is.
Well, you, and all of us here at Dapper Boi.
There’s a lot to be said for how you present yourself to the world - whether it’s a first date, a final interview, going to a fancy event, or having a chill day at the beach, you dress differently for the occasion. When you do that, you’re telling your brain how you’re supposed to act, sound, and be when you’re at the event itself: after all, you’d certainly behave differently at the beach if you showed up in a tux, and you’d definitely behave differently if you showed up at a formal event in a bikini, right?
Right.
So, we ask you: take a look at your closet.
What do your clothes say? What image are you presenting to the world? Why this and not something else? What do you want to tell people with your sartorial choices?
If you find yourself wishing that there was more “normalization” of androgynous attire, or if you remember when you were a kid and forced to wear clothes that were so not your style, or if you’ve ever thought that the definition of “fashionable” should mean something wholly different than what you see in the magazines…
Say so.
And not out loud, during the MET Gala when the celebs are walking the red carpet and your office co-workers are having a watch party. Not even on Twitter or Facebook.
Say it yourself, as quietly or as loudly as you can, just by letting the world see you.
When you choose to wear a suit instead of a dress; a pair of slacks instead of a skirt; a tie instead of a pearl necklace; or when you go against what may be culturally expected in any of the other million myriad fashion choices that are needlessly gendered, you are becoming a beacon. You are becoming what you need to be, and what you needed others to be for you in the past.
When you present yourself as you truly are, you are doing a service to the world, to others looking for someone just like you, and most importantly, to yourself. There are so many people - too many - who are all too willing to pack themselves into a box and hide what makes them unique. Special. Themselves. There are so many people so desperate to “fit in”, they never stop for a moment and think about what it is exactly they’re fitting into.
Whether it’s “American corporate business attire”, or “how a lady should dress”, or even “how everyone in my social group dresses”, in most cases it sure isn’t their best selves. Can’t we all agree that our best selves is all we should ever be trying to fit into? It does, after all, fit the best!
Everyone has a personal style, and most people let that style bleed into their day-to-day aesthetic, whether consciously or not, intentional or not. The degree to which a given person is able or willing to push the boundaries of their tyle ad challenge the “norm” varies, of course, and there are some people who are more than happy to have their personal, best-selves style line up with whatever the socially acceptable presentation is.
But there are others.
There’s us here at Dapper Boi.
There’s our customers.
There’s you.
You’re not everyone else. That’s okay.
That’s a good thing.
In fact, here at Dapper Boi, we think that’s a great thing. The best thing of all, maybe.
You’re brave. You’re bold. You’re not afraid to buck the trends. You don’t mind going against the grain - maybe you even enjoy it.
Either way, we know you look good doing it.
And other people do too! For all the “don’t judge by the cover” platitudes you hear, people do judge by outward appearances. Not always in a negative way, of course - if you haven’t been living under a rock, you’ll know the royal family is an excellent example. People have been analyzing their clothes for decades, looking for symbols, metaphors, secret messages. Someone wearing this color and not that one obviously means this or that.
It’s no different when it comes to our American royalty and the politics of clothes (just think of Hilary’s pantsuits!), of style. Short hair, long hair, dresses, suits, ties, it goes on and on. Politicians know that the packaging they come in is part of the sell.
It’s the same for us mere commoners. We send a message with what we put on our bodies. Sometimes it’s “take me seriously as a professional”. Other times it’s “I look good, I know it and I know you know it too”. Or maybe it’s “don’t look at me too closely” - because the messaging isn’t always about shouting to be heard; sometimes it’s about whispering to be avoided. If someone is uncomfortable with attention of any kind, it only makes sense they’d dress in such a way as to deflect it.
We at DapperBoi believe in serving people along every point of this scale. After all, dressing quietly doesn’t mean you have to dress poorly - at least, not here. For the middle-grounders, you’ll find plenty of pieces that dress up or dress down a casual or fancier outfit.
And for the people who want their clothes to express themselves at top volume, every day, no matter the occasion or event?
Welcome to your one-stop shop for your closet refresh. Welcome to a community of like-minded (and like-styled!) individuals that know exactly where you’ve been and know exactly where you’re going - because they’re going there too.
If you’re new here: Welcome to DapperBoi.
If you’re one of our regulars: Welcome back.
Either way, we’re glad you’re surviving this new world we live in. We’re glad to know you’re not going to let anything dampen your wardrobe, or your passion.
We’re glad you’re here.
Welcome home.